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Waiting for the Perfect Time Sustains Chaos
Waiting for the Perfect Time Sustains Chaos
We were five days into our 14 month RV adventure when we had the first problem with the RV - a flat tire. Twenty days in when the black tank didn’t empty. Three months when we nearly got snowed in at a campsite. A wheel fell off the RV, we hit a deer, a tree branch put a hole in the side of the rig… “It’s always something,” was a mantra my husband grumbled in frustration so many times (because he was the one dealing with and fixing all of the “somethings”!). I usually responded with “It’s always something at home too”, but he didn’t really buy it. These problems seemed ready-made to interfere with our plans for and enjoyment of this RV adventure.
Footage from our RV trip
As time elapsed and we settled in as full-timers in RV life, the problems didn’t feel so overwhelming. When we returned to bricks-and-mortar-life, I was quick to point out to Dave the things that went wrong at home too - “See, it is always something!” But at home, the problems with the house didn’t feel quite as disruptive to our plans in life. As I thought about “somethings”, I began seeing how this was happening in other aspects of my life as well.
“I’ll start my exercise program (plan) as soon as I get through the upcoming trauma recertification at work (“something”).”
“We’ll do better with family dinners once the soccer season is over.”
“I’ll find time for coffee with a friend as soon as I’ve got my inbox under control.”
“I’ll start when things settle down.”
Over time, it finally hit me:
Life is the "somethings". They are the default, not the exception.
Just like troubles with the RV were a part of being full-time RVers, bumps and distractions are a part of life. The key is how to navigate the journey of many "somethings" that seem to be in the way of our goals.
Accept the Truth: The Perfect Time Doesn’t Exist
Accept the Truth: The Perfect Time Doesn’t Exist
The first thing is accepting that they will always be there. The “perfect time” for important things may not be marked with the universe shoving you in that direction and displaying clear signs. We waste so much energy waiting for a clear signal or a calm week. The “perfect time” may pass quietly in between all of the “somethings”. The important tasks - eating healthier, saving money, learning new skills - must be worked into the interruptions.
Embrace the Power of Incrementalism
Embrace the Power of Incrementalism
The second is recognizing that important things can be snuck in. Small, incremental changes do matter and amount to significant shifts over time. You don’t have to overhaul your life today. Replacing one snack a week with a healthier choice, spending 5 minutes a day organizing priorities, saving $100 each month. Over time these result in a healthier diet, a more intentional approach, increased retirement funds. Small hinges swing big doors.
Recognize Discomfort as a Sign of Progress
Recognize Discomfort as a Sign of Progress
As I think about how big and disruptive the RV issues felt at the start, I now realize that the discomfort wasn’t a warning. It was a sign that we were making a big change. Our primitive brain does not like change and will try to protect us by making the inevitable bumps and “somethings” feel more monumental. When a disruption feels especially frustrating, I remind myself: This is not a failure; it is the discomfort of meaningful growth.
So where have I landed with this? I know that life will always ‘get in the way’ if I try to wait for the perfect time to make a change. The more important the change is to me, the more likely that I will need to work it in incrementally and anticipate discomfort as a sign of progress. What goals are you putting off while waiting for the “perfect time”?
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